Pros and Cons of Each of the 5 Mascot Choices

The 5 finalists for the new El Paso Triple A baseball team mascot were announced this week and the response has been...less than enthusiastic.  Running the range of emotions from "offended" to "bewildered" I have heard even the staunchest of Mountain Star supporters offer negative opinions. Former Diablo owner Jim Paul called into the Morning Show and wondered how many people in the decision making process are even from El Paso. Worse, some of the comments from team leadership make it seem very close to mocking or condescending.

Talking about the thousands of entries submitted, MountainStar president Alan Ledford said:

    "The quality and thoughtfulness behind the names submitted was truly remarkable. El Pasoans really gave serious thought and consideration to the history, culture and unique attributes of their hometown when submitting names, and we were all impressed with the creativity."

That's probably a pretty standard line of corporate pap fed to the masses in any city, but it's an odd statement considering the 5 names selected out of 5600 suggested. Which team name exactly does such a good job of reflecting the "history, culture and unique attributes" of El Paso?  Aardvarks???  Buckaroos?!?

Here's list of each of the team mascot finalists and my pros and cons for each.

Aardvarks

Pros:

• On first page of most dictionaries.
• Very easy to look up the definition, which many of us will need.

Cons:

• Not indigenous to El Paso.
• Or North America.
• Or the Western Hemisphere.

   Sun Dogs

Pros:

• Hot Dog selling potential.

Cons:

• Refers to atmospheric phenomenon that occurs in frigid climates.
• When I picture mascot, I can only think of Poochie.

Worst...Itchy and Scratchy...Character...Ever!

   Buckaroos

Pros:

• Derived from Spanish word "vaquero" which means "cowboy".

Cons:

• Sounds like name of gay country/western bar.
• If the team isn't doing well, fans will almost certainly call them "Suck-aroos".

    Chihuahuas

Pros:

• Breed of dog associated with Mexico
• Many El Pasoans do, in fact, own chihuahuas

Cons:

• Breed known as being "small, annoying, nervous and unable to get base hits in crucial innings"
• Favored breed of Hiltons and Kardashians.
• Yo quiro Taco Bell.

      Desert Gators

Pros:

• Refers to actual alligators that were kept in San Jacinto Plaza during first half of the 1900's.
• Sounds like a menacing, if geographically unlikely, foe

Cons:

• Draws attention to El Paso's half century of horrible animal abuse.
• "Desert Gator" would be good slang term for blown tire tread you see about every 1/2 mile on I-10.