Top Stan Lee Pick Up Lines
It’s happened. We’ve got some activity on our MoSho Celebrity Sex Scandal Roulette. A few months ago we all agreed to choose one male celebrity who we think never, not in a million years, would be implicated in any kind of sex scandal. If any of our picks ARE involved in a sex scandal, the person who picked them has to get a tattoo of their face somewhere on their body.
The premise behind this is that if you’d asked who was least likely to be accused of sexual impropriety in…say, 1987…lots of people would have confidently picked Bill Cosby. Can you imagine walking around with a Cliff Huxtable in an Ugly Eighties Sweater tattoo today?? You’d be almost as big of a pariah as he is!
Lisa had picked comic book legend Stan Lee. Guess what!
She doesn’t have to get inked today. Part of the rules are that the allegations have to be “credible” and we just don’t know enough about the story yet. In short, there are some home health nurses who say 95-year-old Mr. Lee had propositioned them, exposed himself and groped them. Lee’s attorney says that it’s not true and this is just an attempt at a shakedown. If, however, it’s found that there’s any truth to the allegations, I’m hoping Lisa goes with the full back-piece with Stan Lee as Uatu the Watcher with “Excelsior!” in 3-inch font.
So, if Stan Lee is, as these nurses claim, a lecherous old coot…what kind of lines do you think he used while being inappropriate? Here’s what I imagine…
“Something’s tingling…and it’s not my Spidey sense!”
“ Can I call you Magneto? Because I think you’re very attractive.”
“ Is Johnny Storm your dad? Because you are smoking hot!”
“Colossus, Cyclops and The Beast. Those aren’t X-Men. They’re nicknames for my penis”
“ The Fantastic Four aren’t the only ones who have a Thing that’s rock hard!”
“ I’ve had a small part in every Marvel movie. Now, I’d like to have a small part in you”
“ ‘Muff said!”
“ Hulk smash…that ass!”
OK. That’s all I’ve got.