Don't Get Fruit Off Gas Pumps In Texas

If you pull up to a gas pump in Texas and find some fruit sitting on top of it, don’t assume it’s a free snack from the gas station.

Although, why anyone would want a peach or an apple or whatever they find just sitting on a random gas pump, I don’t get. I wouldn’t.

In this case, the danger's not having bugs on it or worrying that it's been poisoned. This, believe it or not, (supposedly) has to do with drugs.

Here’s the deal … if you see fruit on a gas pump in Texas, there’s probably a drug dealer watching it. Whichever piece of fruit you pick up, indicates what drug you wish to purchase.

I don’t know which fruit means what but that’s how the internet says it works and, has the internet ever lied to you?? If you draw out a dealer and then don’t buy anything, things could get ugly. On the other hand, this could be a total, gigantic load of internet BS.

I don’t know who came up with this system but, if it's true, they didn't think it through very well. What if a cop is watching the pump too?

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Somebody grabs the kiwi, Mr. Dealer walks up, the cops yell freeze and everyone’s off to the clink. Dealer and deal-ee just pretty much handled an entire sting operation FOR the po-po.

This "fruity" plan would never work in El Paso. We’re not that stupid and, unless it's covered in tajin, something spicy or floating in a margarita; we're not that into fruit.