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The “Day After Christmas” Tale.

drunk-santa
scott ronson

Lyrics from the song “Twas the Day After Christmas”:

T’was the day after Christmas, and all through the house, Every creature was hurting– even the mouse. The toys were all broken, their batteries dead; Santa passed out, with some ice on his head.

Wrapping and ribbons just covered the floor, while Upstairs the family continued to snore.

And I in my T-shirt, new Nike Shoxx and jeans, Went into the kitchen and started to clean.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the sink to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the curtains, and threw up the sash.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a little white truck, with an oversized mirror.

The driver was smiling, so lively and grand; The patch on his jacket said “U.S. POSTMAN.”

With a handful of bills, he grinned like a fox Then quickly he stuffed them into our mailbox.

Bill after bill, after bill, they still came.

Whistling and shouting he called them by name:

“Now Dillard’s, now Macy’s, now Penny’s and Saks Here’s Nordstrom’s and Target’s and Tiffany’s — all here!!

To the tip or your limit, every store, every mall,Now chargeaway-chargeaway-chargeaway all!”

He whooped and he whistled as he finished his work.

He filled up the box, and then turned with a jerk.

He sprang to his truck and he drove down the road, Driving much faster with just half a load.

Then I heard him exclaim with great holiday cheer,

“ENJOY WHAT YOU GOT … YOU’LL BE PAYING ALL YEAR!

Via LyricsPlayground

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