The MoSho Disagrees About What Constitutes a “Mullet”

“I thought Billy Idol looked really cool…his hair was all spikey, so I got that haircut but left it long in the back. I think (it) kind of accidentally might have…created one of the worst hairstyles of all time, the mullet.”

Full disclosure: when I saw Lost Boys in the theater I thought Kiefer’s hair looked…and I’m sure these are close to my actual words at the time…” totally bitchin’”.

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And, clearly, Kiefer’s character was sporting what we now recognize as “a mullet”.

But, I pointed out, OTHER characters also had mullets. Like the guy who played Bill in Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure…

I made the point that even Jason Patric was rocking a more subdued version of the mullet:

That’s when Nico and Joanna…who weren’t even BORN when Lost Boys came out (!)…opined that Michael’s doo didn’t qualify as a mullet. They kept pointing out Achy-Breaky era Billy Ray Cyrus as what a “real” mullet looks like.

And, yes, that IS a magnificent example of a Mississippi Mud-flap. An Ape-drape. A Missouri Compromise…whatever you want to call it.  But it’s an extreme example of a Trailer Park Neck-Warmer.

My understanding has always been that a mullet is: a hairstyle that is SIGNIFICANTLY longer in the back than it is on the sides. So, while Joe Dirt definitely has a mullet, I would argue that for most of the run of “Seinfeld”, Jerry also had a mullet. Here’s the most classic example of the Mull-feld that I could find:

Is it a fully Cyrus-style Tennessee Top-hat? No, it’s not.  But I strongly assert that this “Jerr-et” definitely meets the requirements for a mullet.

I welcome your comments on what is and isn’t a mullet. If I get enough response I might even share my student ID card photo from 1988 and let you savages decide if I had a mullet or not.