German Company Seeks Applicants for ‘Brothel Testing’ Position

Do you enjoy sex? Do you mind traveling the world to have sex in different countries with different women? If you answered "yes" to the first question and "no" to the second, then you might have what it takes to land a job as a brothel tester for a German company.

The deadline to apply is March 29th so you've only got a few days. I want to make sure you saw all the requirements they have for the position.

If you don't read German, allow me to translate. The gist is they want someone who can travel to their legal brothels in Germany, China and Spain and have sex with their prostitutes. You'd basically be doing quality control. Kind of like a secret shopper for Kmart, but without having to degrade yourself by going inside a Kmart.

You know, things like, "Is it clean" and "Is IT clean". Do the girls practice safe sex? Because, for some reason, they see that as a positive thing.

Now, there are some qualifications they're looking for in applicants.

Do you speak fluent German? If not, go to this website and start cramming.

Do you have a college degree? If not, I recommend you go here and ask them if they have an accelerated degree program. Like, one that will take three days.

Do you have "practical experience with making visits to brothels"? They want someone with hands-on experience, so if you've never been to a brothel, I'll give you directions to one as soon as I look up your mom's address. I kid, I kid! Everybody knows your mom doesn't charge.