Even Mexican Pastries Come Knocked Up – Scott Nearly Killed By Baby Jesus

It's been a year now, I aint touchin that baby jesus pastry this year!!!!!

This story could only happen to RALAMPAGO BLANCO. Today I get to work and in the kitchen area in some kinda Mexican pastry that has no flavor ( is there any other kind?) and I decide to grab a chunk and fill my gullet. Low and behold, the firkin pastry comes with a toy. No warning that there could be a choking implement in my treat.

Walking around trying to figure this thing out, I find out it's a ROSCA DE REYES pastry, also known as Three Kings Cake, and now I have to buy Tamales in February. What the hell is wrong with you people? Yes, I said you people. Are you trying to kill off your familia or what? What the hell is Rosca De Reyes? Congressman Reyes' illegitimate kid in a pastry?

Was it wrong to be looking at boobs when I found little Jesus?? Naw!!