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Here’s Proof El Pasoans Have Smaller Penises Than Men in Las Cruces

A list has been compiled of the biggest to smallest member size of each state in America. Texas, apparently not everything is bigger here.

Stock Photo
Stock Photo

A condom company has compiled a list of the biggest and smallest members in the country by states. Now, the information in this survey could be (okay it totally is) unscientific, especially since the data was compiled from websites that deliver condoms by mail. So expect rural areas to do better on the survey than others. If a rural state still does bad on the list, they must really be bad then.

Even if your state is shown to have tiny Johnsons, don’t buy the Magnums just to try and make yourself feel a little more manly. Nothing is more annoying to a girl then when she has to fish around in her vag looking for a condom because you’re trying to pretend your tiny peen is bigger.

If you’re smaller, own it. Make sure you know all the right moves and all her parts. If you are able to satisfy her through other means as well as your penis, she really won’t care as much about the penis. And to the guys that are big in the pants, you can absolutely still be bad in the sheets. Don’t rely on just being well endowed. Just because it has a head, it can’t think on its own. It can’t figure out where a woman’s g-spot is, or what she is into in the sack. You are still responsible for the action that happens between the sheets.

Here’s the list from the smallest to largest peens by state. Sadly, you don’t have to look very far from the bottom to find Texas. You can read more about this article in Time.

  1. North Dakota
  2. Rhode Island
  3. South Dakota
  4. District of Columbia
  5. Massachusetts
  6. Ohio
  7. Arizona
  8. Alabama
  9. New York
  10. South Carolina
  11. Colorado
  12. Maryland
  13. Wisconsin
  14. New Jersey
  15. California
  16. Florida
  17. Connecticut
  18. Virginia
  19. Oregon
  20. Pennsylvania
  21. Washington
  22. Tennessee
  23. New Mexico
  24. Iowa
  25. Illinois
  26. Louisiana
  27. Vermont
  28. Utah
  29. Maine
  30. Nebraska
  31. Idaho
  32. Kansas
  33. Delaware
  34. Michigan
  35. Nevada
  36. New Hampshire
  37. Oklahoma
  38. Montana
  39. Minnesota
  40. Kentucky
  41. Texas
  42. Indiana
  43. West Virginia
  44. Missouri
  45. Alaska
  46. North Carolina
  47. Wyoming
  48. Arkansas
  49. Hawaii
  50. Mississippi

“Where is Georgia,” you ask. For unknown reasons, the company left them off the list. Poor, Georgia.

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