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Walking Dead, Talking Dead … Writing Dead (Spoilers!)

Photo by Michael Buckner/Getty Images for AMC

The Walking Dead season only ended 2 days ago and I already miss it.  If you’re a big time “undead head”; you may not want to read this.  There be spoilers here…….

Is it weird that I’m already jonesing so hard for a show I initially didn’t even like??  I had been waiting longer between episodes than this (a week at a time) when the season was actually running!  I guess knowing that this time I’ll  have to wait til fall for my Zombie fix is making it worse.

Sunday night though, I was about to write WD off. 

First, let’s go back a bit.  I wasn’t really all that into this show the first time I watched it.  Merely indulging my girl but something weird happened.  Much like the “infection” thats got the dead up and romping around; the show gradually got into my brain and started getting interesting.  Then really interesting.  Then …. dare I say it …. a must!!  I began to plan my Sunday evenings around this dang show!! 

Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

Consequently, with my schedule, I now pledge my undying (get it??) admiration to the wonderful world of DVR.  It probably won’t be long before it .. the DVR .. is leading me around armless and on a chain. The brainless part I’ve already taken care of thanks to … ironically enough … TV itself!

Anyway, imagine my horror (there he goes again) when the last couple of episodes seemed to be “coming undone” shall we say. Main characters are getting killed off. The relationships are getting almost comical.  They’re surviving things they really shouldn’t. Shane has every chance in the world to off Rick and doesn’t.  Then he (Shane) himself is killed and immediately gets reanimated.  No bites, scratches, etc;  just “insta-zombie”.  (Shanes death thanks to ”psycho in training” Carl.  I was proud of him there though; Shane was an a**hole.)

Then an army of heretofore unnoticed zombies go “flash mob” (Or would that be FLESH MOB?? Haaaa!) on the farm. 

Really??  With all the characters wandering around the farm area and driving in and out, etc; no one noticed a bazillion “Walkers” living behind the wood shed?  WTF??  (I won’t even get into how the cast then decide that rather than running; they should drive around in circles wasting what little ammo they have trying to kill all the dead people.)

Not to mention; this “lemming – like” zombie mosh was all caused by a helicopter flying over?!?!  C’mon …….

Guess the Walkers thought it was a FEMA helicopter; because they “bought the farm” (HAAAAA!! Get it?????) Breaking fences, destroying the barn and generally engaging in bad and unruly zombie behavior; it was reminescent of parts of New Orleans after Katrina!  All the while, the Doctor refuses to leave.  I’m surprised the old man didn’t start yelling: “Hey; you zombies get ouffa my lawn” Or, “You’re parents are gonna pay for that”!! 

Then; who the hell runs INTO a burning barn full of zombies?? 

Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images

Lastly, a savior appears.  Some “Lord Of The Rings” reject with (most of) a couple of zombies tied to her.  (Spoiler number 1 … yes; it’s a “she”.)

Understand my concern??  This is getting kinda stupid.  Could Walking Dead be about to jump the zombie shark?? 

Nooooooo!! 

I was really kinda bummed thinking that such a great show was about flame out quicker than Hershels’ barn!!.  But then I learned a few things.  (Apparently; if I would actually sit through “Talking Dead” after each episode I would know more about all this stuff.  To much ADD in me for that I guess…)  

CAREFUL!!!!!!!  Here come the rest of the (potential) spoilers!  (Those of you that actually watch Talking Dead .. or read the comic books .. may already know a lot of this!  The rest of you; you’ve been warned!!)

Turns out there is a method to this madness!  Where I feared the show may be in it’s death throes (there he goes again…) it seems there is indeed a lot of this story left to tell! 

Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images

The “Walker” walker at the end is in a position to help.  (The other 2 players in her sexy, undead three-way are her boyfriend and his best friend. Kinky!!) I don’t know what led to her cutting off their arms, pulling their teeth and dragging their lifeless bodies around behind her; but it does seem to keep the other zombies out of her hair! (My own theory is that the boyfriend did the unthinkable.  He actually said; “why yes dear; that outfit does make your ass look big”.)  Whatever; this chick (Michonne) knows a thing or two!!

The prison they showed at the end would (and probably will) make an awesome stronghold.  Just remember; the problem with prisons is that they don’t build ‘em for keeping things out so much as for keeping things in.  (Not a lot of exits in those!!)  I think I see where this is going and it should be interesting.  I myself would vote against going in there but, we’ll see …….

Lastly, the helicopter that started the million zombie march certainly sets the stage for a new characters arrival.  Could it be The Governor??  As I understand it, The Governor isn’t exactly one of the nicest guys left in the world.  He may have even used that chopper to actually lead that zombie road trip to Hershels’ farm?!  Hmmmmm…….

Nope, no “shark jumping” here … it’s about to get better!!

Can’t wait ’til Fall!!!!!!!

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