Want proof that Walmart really (and indirectly) loves its customers? Well, Indiana resident Travis Lively found out when he hit the discount retailer to purchase a DVD player so he could watch movies with his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day. He nabbed a $30 Magnavox machine, took it home, opened it up and noticed that it came with a DVD already inserted into the slot. Note we said “inserted.” We also said “slot.” Scrawled on the burned DVR copy were the words ‘Black Crack Attack#2,’ which we can assure you has nothing to do with a road department fixing a pot hole. There were also six x’s written on the disc in Sharpie ink. Must be a really dirty movie when the standard triple x won’t do, to say nothing of the fact that the the title pretty much gave away the nature of the content.

“It’s not something you expect,” said Lively, who is 29, lives in Lafayette and apparently has a sense of humor. He also watched a few seconds of the film to make sure it was what he thought it was. Uh huh. We’re sure that was the sole reason. That and the quality acting, right?

Walmart’s spokespeople did not respond to the local paper’s requests for comment about how hardcore porn ended up in the DVD tray. While it might be easy to assume an employee is probably about to lose his or her job over it, the box was sealed with no evidence of being “pre-owned.” So perhaps someone at the Magnavox plant played a prank before shipping the machine off to Lafayette. Or maybe he or she was making sure the machine “worked” while alone in the break room, if you catch our drift.

There’s also the outside chance that a previous owner who returned the item left the vid in the tray. But how could a pervert survive without ‘Black Crack Attack #2?’ Perhaps by watching the first one over and over.

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