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Spencer Platt, Getty Images
Spencer Platt, Getty Images
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10 Jokes About the Rapture

So, the rapture is coming. Again. Yup, Harold Camping — the preacher whose prediction the world would end this past May 21 — now says the apocalypse is set for Friday, October 21.

So, make sure your checkbook is balanced, you’ve turned off all the lights and filled your dog’s bowl with water. But, if we’re going to leave this world, why not leave with a smile, right? Here are 10 jokes about the rapture. Think you’ve got good ones? We’d love to read them, so feel free to include yours below.

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Brett Deering, Getty Images
Brett Deering, Getty Images
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College Football Top 25 Weekend Recap

The college football season is underway. Week one was mostly a humdrum affair, with Notre Dame and TCU suffering the biggest upsets among ranked teams. Here’s a complete look at how the top 25 did:

#1 Oklahoma 47, Tulsa 14

Junior walk-on RB Dominique Whaley rushed for 131 yards and four touchdowns in the top-ranked Sooners’ season opener. Any chance Tulsa had in the game vanished earlier in the week

Broward Sheriff's Office
Broward Sheriff's Office
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Bride Arrested For Biting Husband on Wedding Night

Bernadette Besario Catan-Keeler’s first night as a married woman probably did not go the way she anticipated.

Police in Lighthouse Point, Florida arrested the 30-year-old woman for attacking and biting her new husband, not even 24 hours after they got hitched.

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Category: News, Weird News Tags: , , ,
centralasian, Flickr
centralasian, Flickr
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Woman Sues After Suffering Burns from Bikini Top

If you’re thinking of getting a nice tan this summer, consider the tale of Robin Corrente first.

The 50-year-old Yaphank, New York woman is suing a bathing suit manufacturer, claiming she suffered third-degree burns after the underwire in the top portion of her bikini became overheated.

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Category: News, Weird News Tags: , ,
derekskey, Flickr
derekskey, Flickr
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Escaped Prisoner Caught When He Knocks on Guard’s Door

There’s a reason men don’t like to ask for help.

A prisoner who escaped from the Olympic Corrections Center in Washington State was captured Wednesday after he knocked on the door of a resort cabin in the woods, only to find out a guard who works at the facility was renting it.

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Category: News Tags: , ,
WUSA
WUSA
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Kids Selling Lemonade at US Open Fined $500 for Not Having Permit [VIDEO]

What does the Grinch do when it isn’t the Christmas season? He apparently hits the links.

A county inspector has fined the parents of children selling lemonade near the US Open at the Congressional Country Club in Bethesda, Maryland $500 because they didn’t have a permit.

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Category: News, Sports Tags: , , ,
trekkyandy, Flickr
trekkyandy, Flickr
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Husband Accused of Hitting Wife With Peanut Butter Sandwich

The situation a Florida married couple found itself in was stickier than the sandwich at the center of it all.

A 24-year-old woman told police her husband hit her in the face with a peanut butter sandwich while they fought over money.

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Chris Chambers
Chris Chambers
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What Teams Are Most Desperate To Win Their First Championships?

You never forget your first love and you can bet you never forget your first title.

The Dallas Mavericks, in business since 1980, have claimed their first NBA title in franchise history by knocking off the vaunted Miami Heat. The Vancouver Canucks, who’ve been in the NHL since 1970, came oh-so-close to  hoisting the Stan

University of New Mexico
University of New Mexico
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University of New Mexico Football Player Arrested for Wearing Baggy Pants on Plane

University of New Mexico football player Deshon Marman’s trip to San Francisco was already sad enough before police got involved.

Marman, who was in the city to attend the funeral of a high school friend, was arrested at San Francisco International Airport Wednesday after he refused to pull up his saggy pants while on a plane heading to Albuquerque, New Mexico.

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Category: News, Sports Tags: ,

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